There are five steps or principles that we should be aware of and which affect and effect the way in which we see ourselves and how other see or perceive us:
Principle 1 ~ Mirror (1 Samuel 25: 1-42)
The first person we should examine is ourselves before we look at others.
Coping with difficult people is hard ~ how do you, cope with yourself.
We see people as they are ~ but as we are!
Through a lens we see others like we like to see others.
Destination & destiny ~ people keep moving, as they believe the next move (destination or destiny) will be the final move!
If you can’t fix problems where you are ~ you can’t fix someone else’s!
What do you do if you see someone you did not want to see?
Big issue ~ if you cannot get along with you, you will not get along with others.
Examine yourself.
How well do you know you?
How much to you like/love yourself. (James 2:8)
What do you see in the mirror ~ does it reflect Christ likeness, if not what steps are you going to take to improve you?
Principle 2 ~ Pain (1 Samuel 18: 6-29)
Hurting people hurt people and are easily hurt by people.
If you are hurting on the inside you will hurt others on the outside.
If someone shakes your hand (you have a splinter in it but do not tell them) and you pull back your hand and wince the other persons reaction is to say sorry did I do something wrong ~ you unintentionally put a splinter into their soul.
Say something innocent and off they go!
Examine yourself.
Have you forgiven those who have hurt you in the past?
This is KEY ~ What is your fingerprint you leave on others?
Principle 3 ~ Hammer (2 Chronicles 10: 1-17)
Never use a hammer to swot a fly off someone’s forehead.
It’s about over reacting ~ Break this principle and you cause others to stay away.
Stay and work in your strength zone and develop your outer zones.
Always be even handed ~ don’t shoot the messenger if they bring bad news.
Maturity does not accompany age ~ age sometimes comes alone.
The hammer may win the battle but it will lose the war.
How come you are so wise ……. Because I was stupid first, therefore I have learnt.
Always go for win ~ win as you may have to leave something on the table.
Examine yourself.
How effectively do you communicate to others through the words you say, how you say (pitch & tone) them and your body language?
Do others recognise you as a person of your word, never quick to respond and consistent?
Do you know what you want out of situations putting the other person or situation first then explaining how you see things and work towards a win-win?
Principle 4 ~ Elevator (Jonah 4: 1-11)
Some people lift you up (eagles) ~ some people bring you down (leaners).
People who lift you up ~ you love to be around them, they give you strength, joy, happiness etc.
Down people only have one bottom the BASEMENT, leaners are down people.
Q. Are you a lifter or a leaner? Do your friends want to be around you or do they put up with you?
People that lean never succeed.
How do you tell a lifter from a leaner?
Lifters influence and add to your energy
Major lifters multiply others
Leaners deplete and subtract your energy
Major leaner divide others and is often done knowingly
Start to recognise the difference between lifters and leaners and move towards the lifters as they will provide the air beneath your wings.
Examine yourself.
How do others see you as a lifter or a leaner?
How do you deal with others who are leaners?
Principle 5 ~ Exchange (1 Samuel 25: 18-35)
Instead of putting people in their place put yourself in their place.
Get into their shoes for awhile and see their perspective before you make a comment.
Don’t lead your life by assumptions, walk slowly understand yourself and others.
The greatest gift you can give is to LISTEN to others.
Do what is right not wrong, learn and exchange incorrect behaviour for positive behaviour.
Examine yourself.
Do you put yourself first or listen to others?
Are you aware of how you come across to others?
Do show behavioural flexibility?
List action points from the five principles, which you will work on over the next three months.
Removing Barriers Releasing Potential 